the disintegration of an idol

::mood::extreme chillin
::music::Little Room, from the album Not Too Late by Norah Jones

there is a point at which every idol breaks down.

you ever get that feeling?

every hero, or inspiration, may be larger than life in your imagination. their influence on you might be limitless. everything you hear only confirms that, one day, when you grow up, you want to be just like them.

the very ground they tread is sacred to you.

but at some point, and usually at the most inopportune time, that vision of perfection will begin to crack.

not crumble, no. it doesn't have to disintegrate before your eyes. but what i'm talking about is that slight imperfection that springs up. the slighter, the worse. because in directly opposite proportion to greatness of your idol, the most insignificant imperfection can cause you to dismiss them entirely.

it's just that little nagging bit of trivia in the back of your mind that comes forth to haunt you whenever your think of this influence, the robber of all pleasure, the dasher of all hopes of emulation. usually a pet peeve, for me, that comes out into the light to cause me to realize that, perhaps, all my visions of this idol are flawed. that, perhaps, when i grow up, i don't want to be just like them after all.

maybe i'm just better off being me. or maybe, i'm better off only accepting the good parts.

i think it's just basic human tendency to look for an idol, tho. someone, or something, maybe some ideology, that contains the whole of everything good, right, and true. some hero to save the day. an example to follow. an inspiration to motivate. a vision to strive for.

it's about motivating yourself by imagining the impossible is really quite possible after all.

i guess that's what makes Jesus so great.

He's the only God that doesn't break down in the end. He's perfect.

and, one day, when i grow up i'm wanna be just like Him.